Grief Triggers
Spring is appearing… and with it comes a realization that this is the seventh spring I have welcomed into my life without my daughter.
The first years were difficult for me. What had been my favorite season, (and my daughter’s) became a very painful time in my grief journey. At first, the triggers reminded me of only the huge hole that was in my life. I saw reminders of Joslin all around me and struggled with how life could go on without her. Those reminders are what I am describing in this article, calling them grief triggers. It might help for you to be aware of them and know what to do when they hit.
If your loss is recent, you likely know that there are a myriad of things which remind you of your loved one, and of your losses. It could be a color, a smell, a word spoken, a favorite flower, a song, or any number of things around you and within you which turn your thoughts to the person who has died. In the beginning, the triggers seem overwhelming because of their number and because of the grief they reveal.
As time goes on, the triggers will still be there, but they will produce less of the intense pain of the initial adjustments to your losses. After some time had passed, they reminded me of special things about Joslin and the distinctive memories I share with her. Hopefully you will find, as I have, that as you become more accustomed to your new life without your special someone, that the grief triggers become gifts to you as you experience them. They carry gifts of remembrance that keep your loved one alive and fresh in your memory. They remind you of the aroma of your loved one which remains in your life. They give you an opportunity to thank God for your loved one, and to remember the specialness of what they brought to your life.
Are you struggling with grief triggers? It is important to notice what you are thinking and feeling. If you don’t, you may find your grief coming out in rage, depression, addictions or irritability. As death touches deep parts of you, you have opportunities to get to know yourself better and to experience life on a deeper level. Here are some ideas which may help you to deal with your grief. Write a letter to your loved one, expressing your pain. Find someone who cares about you and will listen to what you are going through. Do something in honor of your loved one, expressing their personality and heart. But do not stay alone in your grief, or try to cover it up.
Wherever you are in your grief journey, remember that the reason you have the grief triggers is because your special someone lived and you loved. As we become more used to the awfulness of missing them we will be thankful for the reminders grief triggers are… a call to remember a loved one and to make good use of the life which remains for us.
Spring is appearing… and with it comes a realization that this is the seventh spring I have welcomed into my life without my daughter.
The first years were difficult for me. What had been my favorite season, (and my daughter’s) became a very painful time in my grief journey. At first, the triggers reminded me of only the huge hole that was in my life. I saw reminders of Joslin all around me and struggled with how life could go on without her. Those reminders are what I am describing in this article, calling them grief triggers. It might help for you to be aware of them and know what to do when they hit.
If your loss is recent, you likely know that there are a myriad of things which remind you of your loved one, and of your losses. It could be a color, a smell, a word spoken, a favorite flower, a song, or any number of things around you and within you which turn your thoughts to the person who has died. In the beginning, the triggers seem overwhelming because of their number and because of the grief they reveal.
As time goes on, the triggers will still be there, but they will produce less of the intense pain of the initial adjustments to your losses. After some time had passed, they reminded me of special things about Joslin and the distinctive memories I share with her. Hopefully you will find, as I have, that as you become more accustomed to your new life without your special someone, that the grief triggers become gifts to you as you experience them. They carry gifts of remembrance that keep your loved one alive and fresh in your memory. They remind you of the aroma of your loved one which remains in your life. They give you an opportunity to thank God for your loved one, and to remember the specialness of what they brought to your life.
Are you struggling with grief triggers? It is important to notice what you are thinking and feeling. If you don’t, you may find your grief coming out in rage, depression, addictions or irritability. As death touches deep parts of you, you have opportunities to get to know yourself better and to experience life on a deeper level. Here are some ideas which may help you to deal with your grief. Write a letter to your loved one, expressing your pain. Find someone who cares about you and will listen to what you are going through. Do something in honor of your loved one, expressing their personality and heart. But do not stay alone in your grief, or try to cover it up.
Wherever you are in your grief journey, remember that the reason you have the grief triggers is because your special someone lived and you loved. As we become more used to the awfulness of missing them we will be thankful for the reminders grief triggers are… a call to remember a loved one and to make good use of the life which remains for us.
posted by Jo Winkowitsch at 1:21 PM
0 comments
